Tag: speak

Urgent!

I’ve been struggling with a sense of urgency towards the very craftmanship of my writing. I guess it’s penmanship? Anyway… so I want to get better at writing, but there’s a few avenues that I’d like to tackle, blogging with a better voice writing fiction with a better voice and also getting better at writing poetry/raps. But it feels like I’m tackling too many giants at once. Someone once said that it’s better to triple down on one thing instead of being half way pregnant in 12 different things. (I think it was Gary Vaynerchuk who said this.) I feel this is very true for the sake of faster progression in one craft.

Though at least one thing is clear, everything I’m interested in progressing has to do with writing, just three very different forms of writing. I love being able to bounce back and forth through the three mediums, however, it seems kind of distracting, as if I’m not getting very far in each medium because my attention or focus is divided. Which is kind of starting to drum up self doubt. What’s funny is, I’m starting to be ok with how I’m progressing. I think the main key to progress within one self is ultimately to fall in love with the process. I think a common pitfall for most people with building mastery in a craft is they probably tend to be a little too hard on themselves, and spend too much worrying about whether it will take them somewhere in the end.

I think the most important part is enjoying the growth as you go along and approaching it like a child. Where the sense of growth is more intuitive and less about whether your progression is impressing enough to outside perceptions. Letting your self breathe and express without worrying if what your doing has worth to other persons or entities. This approach is freeing in a way. Though, I would like to say that, while this method or whatever you wanna call it, is freeing it also doesn’t mean that one should expect growth without persistence, however it is just an opinion formulated by personal experience.

Yo I almost sound intelligent! Woop. Happy Friday y’all. Do what you love, love what you do. I finally get that expression!

Dissonance

Where does one find inspiration to write? Is it in the books that we read? Is it meeting a homeless person on the street and caring enough to even say hi, how you doing, getting to know them, giving them more than 1$, giving them a full meal and having a heart felt conversation? 

Does one find inspiration from the dissonance that happens in a persons life and then write about that? Do you have a fight or an argument with someone and then write down all your frustrations and anger and release all the thoughts of fear onto a medium? Is when you sit there and try hard to write something that has a bit a prose, digging deep into the thesaurus or dictionary, and referencing favorite authors to dig deeper into the creative writing space using parts of your brain you don’t normally use to get through the mundane workings of “normal” everyday life? 

Finding your voice is definitely an every changing puzzle. Its like once you complete certain little puzzles, the puzzle gets bigger and more convoluted. There is always room for improvement especially when your first starting out it seems. “A friend once told me, your never gonna be at where you want to be, but you gotta remind yourself, you aren’t where you used to be. So give yourself credit once in a while.” I actually agree with this, and I feel it is an important process, even though it may feel like conceited or coming from a space of ego, but it really isn’t in my opinion, its more like congratulating yourself because you made it this far. Its more like a private victory that you share with your self because your going through the motions. Its more like you got up, you faced your anxiety, your fear, your loneliness, your depression, your whatever the fuck it is, call it the EGO, call it the FEAR BASED BEING that has shaped you for the past how many ever years. BUT hey! Your here, your reading this, your writing, your acting, your singing, your gaming, or doing whatever it is thats allowing you to grow. OR maybe you’re not. BUT your still alive, which means you STILL have a chance, you still can cut those old circles of friends off that isn’t growing you, and if you don’t have many friends, well you CAN, face your fears and get out of that comfort zone and go learn how, (or you can friend me, I’m always looking for new growth buddies lol.) you CAN quit that nasty cigarette habit, by replacing it with some new habits.

Thing is, I don’t even know what I’m doing with this blog, and probably neither will all of humanity when they first start things. BUT I do feel a pull, and eventually you’ll get that one person that acknowledges what you’re doing, and gives you dabs. Like for example, I totally randomly found this person named Anh’s blog and it HELLA inspired me to write because her prose was so on point yanno? So I left a comment and I started following her. And you know what, SHE READ SOME OF MY POSTS, and sent me a COMMENT, a RESPONSE, and I was ABSOLUTELY baffled. I couldn’t even believe what I was reading, it was an actual comment from an actual person with real feelings and a voice and she stepped out of her zone to say something about. My writing. I mean WHAT? 

Anyway, I guess just keep pushing, in a nut shell, is what I’m trying to say. I think its a lot easier for me to just say fuck it and post whatever it is thats on my mind on this blogging site, because in all reality only like 2 people I know in real life, know about this blog. I feel like I can just be myself here. Where as in real life my ego feels like it needs to protect who I was in the past so these people around me don’t judge me. I’m slowly getting over that way of thinking, because to be honest, someone once told me while I was locked up, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” 

I just googled that quote and apparently its from Dr. Seuss lol. Have a blessed day y’all.